I just launched my shiny new website for my freelance editing.  www.esledit.org I offer professional editing, specializing in serving non-native English speakers.

“Writing in English isn’t always easy even for native speakers.  It is a complex language, with more exceptions to the rules than rules themselves.  Whether you are writing an application essay, a term paper, a thesis or a journal article, you want your writing to clearly express your thoughts.   Grammar mistakes and structural flaws distract the reader, bring down your grade and diminish professional credibility.  My mission is to help you express yourself in perfect English that allows your ideas to shine.”

I’ve been thinking, as I often do, about how we develop our identity — how we think of ourselves and how we try to appear to the world.  I’ve always found that decisions against something tend to be as strong an incentive for me as decisions towards something.  A friend in college, for example, who talked about herself all the time and never asked about me is a big reason why I try to be a good listener to this day.  Legalism in any context but especially in my own religion has defined by contrast my concept of God and grace and compassion in general.  I think that’s okay, I think that’s how we learn about the world and how we continue to develop our thoughts and opinions.  But ultimately I don’t want my answer to, “Who are you,” to be, “I’m against insensitivity,” or “legalism” or even “injustice,” as important as resistance to evil is.  I want to be positive, not in the sense of cheerful and perky necessarily, or even optimistic, but in a more basic, even mathmatical sense.  +Jessica.  I want not just to fight evil (in whatever form); to reduce the bad.  I want to add good, to be good, to be truth and beauty that stands on its own, not that’s defined as what it’s not.

Think about your response to questions about politics, religion, society, humanity.  If you can only answer what you dislike about Republicans (or Democrats), religious  fundamentalism (or atheism), separatism (or integration), free will (or predestination)*, then do you really have an opinion, an identity?  What if all the “bad” suddenly disappeared?  Would you know who you are?

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*I’m not listing these pairs as opposites, only as disparate.

Look how excited I was!

This has nothing to do with the above picture, but I wanted to say a prayer for my friends who are feeling the darkness of the season — Seasonal Affective Disorder, they call it, but I call it, “Why are we still living in New England when there are so many warmer, viable options?”  But, here we are, and the gorgeous autumn that we just experienced as a perk of the region is being followed, as it always is, by months of dark and cold.

Hang in there.

Spring will be here in a few short months, and in the meantime, God loves you as much as he did on the most brilliant summer day, even if your tan has faded and you have gained ten pounds and don’t get out of your pajamas for days at a time.

Swiss artist Felice Varini used this town as a canvas for a piece of abstract art.  The art is amazing, but wouldn’t you love to live in a small gingerbread town on the edge of the Alps, even without the circles?

Click here for the full image.

This weekend I had the chance to house sit for some good friends who recently moved to the country.  It was a really nice, peaceful weekend; felt good to get away.  Here are some pictures.

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How my great-grandmother was married, written by one of her daughters, Anne, my great-aunt.  For the non-Polish speakers, Babci = Grandma and Dziadzi = Grandpa.

In Easthampton, Massachusetts it was a Polish Catholic parish!  That was how the young people met.  With extra long work days, and so many church services, there was not much time for play.

-And so it was that Jozef eyed Antosia, inviting her to a first date to accompany him to Mass on a Sunday to hear the “banns of marriage” announcing their forthcoming marriage.

Banns of Marriage” were announcements made after a Sunday sermon to convey to the public that a couple was to be joined in marriage.  If there was to be an objection for any reason, the priest was to be notified before the wedding date.

Antosia and her girlfriends knew who Jozef was, or knew of him, but Antosia was not proposed to by Jozef – in fact, he had never spoken to her before that.  Apparently, he went to the rectory on his own, submitted his and her name, and assumed there would be no problem.

Antosia was flabbergasted to say the least.  She immediately meant to go to the rectory to explain the “misunderstanding”.  Her girlfriends preyed on her humility saying that she could not be waiting for a “Knight-in-shining-armor” to ride in on his white horse to spur her away! Even they knew those fairy tales of old!

They convinced her that she was so lucky to be chosen by such a handsome, intelligent, industrious young man.  Jozef’s plan for the wedding proceeded!  Antosia’s plan for her future was detoured!

The wedding took place on a Saturday (January 15, 1915) – party into Sunday –  Jozef went off with “the guys”, and Antosia slept in a rocking chair at his “Aunt’s” house waiting for her honeymoon.
Sixty years later, when Dziadzi began becoming “obstreperous” with the beginning of senile dementia, Babci reminded him of the honeymoon they never had!  She said – “and where did you take me for a honeymoon – Bermuda, maybe?”

On Monday, they all went back to work!  The whole male contingent of the bridal party went to the priest to “take the pledge”.  It was a vow not to use alcohol for one year.  I guess it was a common practice.

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My great-grandmother had always wanted to become a nun!  Good thing for me, I guess, that she didn’t.  Still, reading this story makes me wish she didn’t give in to my great-grandfather!  Just a note for any potential suitors: I prefer to know in advance before the banns go up.